Perspective

I am never more aware of the grace of God when faced with death...

Nothing can change your perspective more quickly than death...

This week I have the pastoral emergency phone. Tonight I got a call from one of our members. His wife has been in hospice since before Christmas and had hung on a surprisingly long time. However, tonight she had finally let go and passed on. She was older and this was expected. He had called one of our pastor's earlier for a visit because they sensed it was coming soon.

And here I am, answering the phone right before Grey's Anatomy started flippantly assuming it's going to be another wrong numbers (I got three wrong numbers today, three!) and all of a sudden I'm reminded that being a pastor means having more than regular office hours. I offered my sympathy and told him I could soon if he needed me. He declined my offer and I then fumbled with my words. I told him we would be praying for him and his family. And I didn't think to pray with him over the phone till now, when I'm typing this up.

I have never been good in the face of death. And it's not because I haven't experienced it; it's because I have and I know there nothing that I can say to make it better. Because words sometimes just don't cover it. Because, cliches are fairly worthless and often do more harm than help. And this is where I come face to face with the grace of God with the understanding that yeah, my words will never be enough. But his Spirit is there. "In the same way the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express." Romans 8:26 (Romans 8, perhaps my favorite chapter in the entire Bible)

And it has been when I have faced these situations that I have found that God's power is made perfect in MY weakness. And that is grace, that when we were still sinners Christ died for us. And I am aware of that grace in the face of death because we trust in that promise, we trust that our loved ones have eternal life because of that promise. We trust that it's okay that we don't have all the right words. We trust that our loved ones are in a better place and that God's grace is enough to cover up for their weaknesses as well.

Then I start looking at my life and everything seems to pale in comparison. It makes you realize what's important, that friendships should stand up to differences, that jobs will come and go, that distance is not a good excuse, and that when it all boils down we live by faith alone.